Modern Ramayana-A Peek into the Socialized Love Story

Everyone, who has the patience to read the title must be wondering what this retarded dolt is gonna write or what fart he's gonna tell us.Yea, you people are absolutely right, this is fart, purely a whimsical work and has got nothing to do with emotions and obviously no way related to religion.
our epics tell us that there was this dude called Rama, who was madly in love with a dudette named Sita. They were madly in love with each other and happily married for a while. Rama had no girl-friends and apparently no flings too. Sita knew only one man in life (Rama owes alot to now a days celebrities like Jhonny Depp, SRK blah blah blah..) and we all know it through Valmiki. But there was a Villain in the story, he is none other than our Ravana. He wanted to get into the pants of Sita and took her out once. Sita had sent a message to Rama about this , which made Rama furious and he chopped Ravana's **** off. They lived happily ever after and made the ideal couple in our Indian history , or atleast we believe it so. I dont think Valmiki was proficient in making false stories or let us be happy with it, as we cant do much about.After all it was a delicate unquestionable history.This ideal couple had children and they had childreb, who are the ancestors of our Modern Rams and Modern Sitas.
Thanks to the advent of Christianity and thanks to the British Empire, who ruled India and finally my sincere postrations to Computers.They are the ones, who taught us civilization, English and ofcourse getting socialized(wink wink).
In this Hugh Hefner's(founder of PlayBoy and F****er of Playmates) era, things changed to an incredible extent. Lets look at the way our epic has taken its birth.
Ram loves Sita and they are living happily till one day, when Sita gets a message from Ravan, asking her out for a dinner or a drink. Sita asks for Ram's consent for the rendezvous with Ravan(unlike our epic Sita , who was even reluctant to have a peek at Ravana). Our manly Ram, sounds more masculine and commands Sita to avoid this meet-up. Sita, who is unhappy with Ram's response says that if only the conditions were applied much earlier, she would not have even met Ram, who asked her out in the similar way. She tries to explain that she was trying to socialize and be more civilized. She opines that there's nothing wrong in having a drink with Ravan, who once wanted to sleep with her(Rama knows what he is thinking of now!!!!?????).
Every Ram in this world was a Ravan once and every Ravan here is gonna be a jealous Ram in a while. This is the rule in this so called and self-proclaimed civilized corporate world. This is an eternal cycle and goes on forever. So , if we can call men as p**n hounds,what our socialized female counter parts called??"b*****s".
For the sake of people with minimal number of grey cells and restricted imagination, I would like to conclude saying that MEN ARE FROM MARS and WOMEN ARE FROM VENUS, considering the fact that Ramayana never happened in ET(Extraterrestrial).